Bachelor Brad redux (October 8th episode)

Let me start out with a few quotes from the first date this week:
"Oh, it's big!"
"She's got a good grip on that."
"I got to pet the elephant."

No, no, no...get your mind out of the gutter. It was a GROUP date to the CIRCUS! Jenni said, "There are no words for it," and I was thinking, of course there are words for it! Fun, entertaining, colorful, loud, goofy, magical, tricky...tons of words for the circus. But I don't want to be too hard on Jenni - I actually like her. I like that she didn't tell the other girls that Brad kissed her. I like that she asked him about a real life situation that would come up if he ends up picking her - that she's committed to her job in Phoenix - and she's not willing to drop all that immediately to move to wherever he is. I like that she doesn't just want to be "the last girl standing" but the girl he falls in love with. She may be a little cheerleaderish (I mean, she IS basically a cheerleader), and that brown strapless velour jumpsuit was a little strange, but I think she's cute.

Brad also had a pretty good one-on-one time with Stephy. She seemed pretty normal and cute. Her longest relationship was in high school and she's been single for 5 years - a girl after my own heart. She may be another pick of mine to go farther.

Lindsey - don't like her accent. DeAnna - don't like her voice or the way her name is pronounced dee-AH-nuh. McCarten - ugh, smug high school biotch. The other girl on the date I don't know anything about, but I think her name is Sarah.

Cut to the girls back at the house and Hilary finds out she got the one-on-one date! And they do a redux of the Pretty Woman-esque date they did in a previous season (I can't remember who they did that with at the moment). She doesn't wear red, but Hilary gets $1 million worth of jewelry to wear, and they take a private plane (taking a limo and then walking out to it on the tarmac) and even go to San Francisco, same place where Edward and Vivian went to the opera in my favorite movie. I'd rate Hilary's performance about a 7 - she did pretty well, but WAY too overemotional with all the tears. What the heck, it's basically your FIRST real date with this guy. You cannot be in love with him yet.

On the other hand, I love that he told her she looked even more beautiful after she'd been crying, and then I loved them making ice cream sundaes at the Ghiradelli place. I have to say this though, what I don't get is the girls who say " I didn't expect this. I didn't expect to fall in love. I didn't expect to meet such a great guy and have these feelings." Why did you come on the show? Isn't that exactly what you were expecting?

Second group date...sailboating. Kristy tried a little too hard to show him her fun side, but she's still a little more real than some of the other girls, so he should keep her for a while. Solisa gives Brad a lap dance: "I went over and started shaking my butt really fast because it's the only thing I know how to do." Again, classy.

Bettina - dang girl, can you let me in on the secret to your leg workout? I think she threw Brad a bit with the divorce thing, but I'd still put money on her staying for a while. Jade - don't like her - another witchy girl. Sheena - eh, I could take her or leave her.

Then, this week's cocktail party slash rose ceremony with...not just Brad...but CHAD! Yes, that's right, the bachelor brings in his married twin brother to try to figure out which girls actually care about him and will be able to tell the difference in the imposter. I have to take back my previous evaluation of this plan - it was actually possibly a pretty good idea, because if a girl can't tell the difference, she obviously (1) isn't that smart, (2) isn't paying that much attention to you, (3) only sees a random hot guy when she looks at you. Brad says Chad will be able to go in there and immediately know who is in it for Brad and who's right for him and not. Sucks for Brad that he can't tell that for himself!

So at the cocktail party...McCarten is a little awkward, but doesn't catch on to the fauxBrad. Lindsey also doesn't figure it out, but also asks him how long he wants to be engaged for...ummm, cause that's super important at this stage of the game. Kristy knows right away even as Chad walks up to her - good job girl - major points. Bettina, Jenni, Sheena, DeAnna & Stephy figure it out pretty quickly. Sarah - clueless. We didn't get to see how Jenni, Hilary, Jade or Solisa reacted to the surprise.

So Brad ends up getting rid of Lindsey, Sarah and Solisa (aka Morticia Addams). Thank goodness. I loved the way he had a little nervous smile when he called Jenni's name and they both giggled. She's going all the way, baby! Lindsey, in her final camera interview says "you think you love someone and you're gonna spend the rest of your life with him..." - WTF?

And now, I will leave you with Solisa's parting words, which are so fitting: "He did see the very special parts of me because I wear those special parts on the outside. So, it's just that those special parts weren't parts that he was looking for, unfortunately." Yeah, we all saw your "special parts" Solisa...when you used them as a shot glass and went skinny dipping and put them all up in Brad's face with your lap dance. Say it with me folks...classy.